Proph Nobster and Jacob were talking on the side of the street when Lunarshade walked up. Proph Nobster said "Hey
Lunarshade come talk with us!" Lunarshade then walked over and said "Hah no way fags." Jacob was very sad that
Lunarshade had said this so he pulled out a pistol he had keistered and shot Lunarshade in the face. But nope
Lunarshade was shep and hurled a magic whoolball at Jacob and breaks 187 bones in his body, killing him instantly.
Proph Nobster then looks at Lunarshade with awe, and says "Wow... that was hot." Lunarshade stared at Proph Nobster for 30 seconds before saying "I know." Proph Nobster was almost near the point of ejaculation at this point and invited Lunarshade over to his house. As they approach his house a little girl about 9 years old walks up to Proph Nobster and asks for 5 dollars. Proph Nobster releases a mighty roar and bitch slaps the girl across the road and keeps walking towards his house. But what if girl is not kill? The little girl runs behind Lunarshade and kicks him in his shepnuts. Lunarshade releases a very loud yelp as his shepnuts are obliterated by the little girl with superman strength. Proph Nobster is in tears as his plans with Lunarshade are ruined by his genitals being severely injured. Proph Nobster still invites Lunarshade into his house and as they were sitting in Proph Nobsters basement Proph Nobster gets up and rips off his shirt revealing a 6 pack of beer and they get drunk off their asses and then Proph Nobster reaches over to Lunarshade and picks him up and lays him on the floor in "The Position". Lunarshade doesnt repel, but he actually gives in, moving towards proph moaning with his deep voice. Proph Nobster rips off Lunarshade's pants and begins to massage his thighs. Eventually Proph Nobster allows Lunarshade to leave but before he does Proph Nobster reveals he is pregnant with Nilly's baby. Lunarshade is saddened by this and goes home in tears but before he does Jacob reveals himself from the sky saying "Sup bitch!" Lunarshade is pleading to Jacob to forgive him, but Jacob doesnt allow this and abducts Lunarshade and brings him to Pluto and makes him get hypothermia and die. Meanwhile Proph Nobster is caring for his and Nilly's baby in Germany when all of a sudden Nilly gets abducted by Sarah Michele and taken to her hidden lair and molests Nilly. Proph Nobster then becomes a superhero and gets Nilly back. Nilly and Proph Nobster live happily ever after and Jacob is in love with Lunarshades shepbody and makes love to it every night for 10 months. Darkfalcoo then tries to kill Quaesitum with his gigantic penis and dickslaps him across the Call of Duty map Rust breaking 142 bones in his body killing him instantly. Meanwhile in Florida Goodperson it talking to grills on the beach and SacredMike walks up and is like "Hey sexy, no not you grill, talking to Goodperson." Goodperson then stares into SacredMikes face and licks him on the cheek. SacredMike is turned on by this and grabs Goodperson and gives him a piggyback ride to the water fountain and tries to molest Goodperson but Goodperson is too quick and slaps SacredMike with a steak and runs away, leaving SacredMike in tears on his knees. But then all of a sudden Jacob comes down from the sky and smiles at SacredMike. SacredMike thinks Jacob will help him... but is he totally wrong......... Jacob takes him to Potammies house and lets SacredMike shove his dick into Potammies mouth choking him to death with his cock. Jacob furiously masturbates to this event and ejaculates all over the room, making it a nice color white. SacredMike leaves the house as Jacob starts to wipe his dick on Potammies dead face. SacredMike makes his way to Omniraptor's house but he is too late, Omniraptor is on his way to a KKK rally in Virginia. SacredMike flies to Virginia and finds Omniraptor at a KKK rally in the same city as Astrovelo. SacredMike goes to the KKK rally and finds Omniraptor, SacredMike lures Omniraptor out of the rally with fried chicken and watermelon. Omniraptor thinks he is getting free chicken because he cant afford it himself, but SacredMike walks up behind him and shoves a cancer needle into his arm infecting him with cancer. SacredMike then takes an axe and brutally smashes Omniraptors head in, blood is gushing everywhere in the small alley that SacredMike lured Omniraptor into, SacredMike then cuts Omniraptors limbs off with a chainsaw and licks the fresh blood from the ground. The police are called and nearly catch SacredMike in the act, but SacredMike is too quick and runs to Astrovelo's house and they both fly out of the country to Proph Nobsters house to hide. Proph Nobster and Nilly welcome them both with open arms and SacredMike cooks them a dinner of Fried Omniraptor with a side of roasted Potammies. Proph Nobster, Nilly, SacredMike, and Astrovelo turn into cannibals and start eating people about twice a week. This turns into an addiction and they eat up to 5 people a week, every meal they had human. they eventually met up with Kithi in Sweden running from the police. Kithi hides them and they get intense internet speeds while they eat people. Zeroeh is working with the police undercover and asks to live with us. Proph Nobster and Nilly say yes as SacredMike and Astrovelo are skeptical. It turns out their skepticism was worth it because they eventually ate Zeroeh on count of him being a police spy. Proph Nobster, Nilly, SacredMike, Astrovelo, and Kithi then team up with Jacob and they move to pluto to avoid the police. They live on pluto for 15 years before Nilly suddenly dies of a sickness not yet figured out. a distraught Proph Nobster gains severe depression and dies soon after. SacredMike and Astrovelo decide to leave and move to mars, as both of them fucking hate the insane cold that pluto has to offer. while Kithi and Jacob stay behind as they are used to the cold and they are both starting to gain a mutual connection, or so Kithi thinks. one day out of the blue Kithi is brutally murdered and Jacob is nowhere to be found. 3 weeks later Jacob turns up on venus in a new mansion he built years ago. He brought along Lunarshades body to keep him company. Meanwhile back on earth Mike is at his house on the computer when a knock on his door frightens him, he wasnt expecting any company. He opens the door to Ehoni and asks "Can i help you?" Ehoni screams and runs away, a frightened Mike runs after him. Ehoni leads Mike into a dark alley where Ehoni then asks Mike "Can i show you something? promise not to tell anybody." and Mike says ok. Ehoni pulls a rabbit out of his bag and sacrifices it to the almighty blackman. "JESUS CHRIST!" says Mike as blood spurts everywhere. Ehoni stares Mike dead in the eyes and whispers "its all ogre now" and grows 5 feet and turns green and runs away. A frightened Mike walks home and locks his door. Later that night he gets a call from a weird number, as he answers there was a lot of static, but he could hear Jacob's voice on the other end. Jacob calls him a faggot and hangs up laughing. Mike sits at his bed confused, but after a couple seconds decides to watch porn, jerk the meatstick, and go to bed. The next morning he gets a knock on the door and it is a little 9 year old girl, who asks for 5 dollars. Mike starts for his wallet but instantly stops when he sees the little girl has a gigantic penis in her pants. this obviously wasnt a little girl... Mike kicks her in the dick and sends her sprawling over the ground and a cucumber falls out of her pants. Mike is horrified of what he has done and cant let her tell anybody. Mike drags the little girl inside his house and decides to sacrifice her to blackman as Ehoni did the night before. That night after he jerked his willy and was sleeping, he saw a vision of Proph Nobster telling him to go to pluto and avenge Nilly. Mike then calls the number Jacob called on and asked a favor, to move him to pluto. Originally Jacob was like "hah nah fag" but eventually gave in. Mike was now living in a mansion on pluto, one of Jacobs old ones. Mike spends 3 years trying to find out the sickness that Nilly died from and came to a conclusion. Nilly had died from a very rare disease called Cock Syndrome, which makes your cock grow to immense lengths, which is very dangerous because if they get a boner they can die from lack of blood in the brain, which is exactly what happened to Nilly. Mike has to deliver the news to Proph Nobster but he had to figure out a way to get in touch with a dead person. Mike calls Jacob again to see how he can do this, and Jacob told Mike he had to die to get in touch with people that are still in purgatory. After days of deciding, Mike finally lets Jacob kill him. Mike gets Jacob to teleport him to venus and lets Jacob brutally murder him. Jacob begins by slicing deep cuts all over Mikes body, covering both in blood. Jacob then starts to rip Mikes juggular vein with his teeth getting the beloved taste for blood he always longed for. With Mike dead he can finally talk to Proph Nobster. After getting in touch with Proph Nobster, Mike tells him what happened, Proph Nobster couldnt believe it and decided to go home. Mike lives the rest of his life with Lunarshade and they become supernatural lovers and occasionally get in some threesomes with proph. Mike never has to jerk his baloney pony again now that he has Lunarshade.