Thread: HPPD/PTSD

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    HPPD/PTSD

    Just a random thread here.
    Was wondering if you guys ever hear/experienced HPPD(hallucinogenic persistant perception disorder) or PTSD(post-traumatic stress disorder)
    FYI HPPD is just PTSD but triggers include visual stimuli ...

    Both are composed of a wide array of symptoms from memory loss to visual distortions to full-blown hallucinations.

    From a few drug experiences a couple years ago, I've developed severe anxiety (Couldn't stay awake for more than 3 hours at a time b/c I was gonna pass out) mild visual distortions(well mild to tryptamine/phenethylamine users) which get worse with decreasing light around me.

    Stuff like:
    Morphing walls, Blending pictures, flickering lights, closing my eyes and seeing blue/red/purple/green/white/yellow(rarely) and orange blobs floating around in a reddish/whitish background..
    Hmm maybe it's just my paranoia but I've also experienced audio hallucinations (completely sober) and tactile.(Coke-bugs and things grasping my arms/neck etc)

    Memory loss is pretty bad. Missed out on months of my life at a time (absolutely no re-collection apart from gf/parents reminding me) and in generally, my memory would last a couple of days at most. Hard to learn new things in school, remember important details (I even forgot my birthday and the party )

    I've done quite a few hallucinogens (Pseudo and Real ones: LSD, Ecstasy, Shrooms, Nos, Diphenhydramine are the main ones)
    I think it's that diphenhydramine that made me trip like this. I had panic attacks from it but not true panic attacks in that sense, these ranging from fractions of a second to 2 seconds max. But it was only after experiencing one of these, I notices severe visual changes. I can no longer see at night. If there's even a dim light in the room, im practically blind and have to feel around to walk.

    Been like this for a little over 2 years...
    Im rather tired of it and can't even feel emotions normally. Blunted affect doesn't seem to describe the emotional loss quite well because even in that you feel something.
    The only feeling I experience when I wake up: Tiredness of the Nothingness...
    Not even news of my pregnant gf phased me...


    So what do you guys thing? Ever experienced this? :P

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    mwxplayer (10-27-2012)