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  1. #1
    .Amnesia's Avatar
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    Writing a book, needing help

    I'm certainly looking forward to some SERIOUS answers, even though the chance is unlikely here at MPGH to get any.

    Anyways, to the point.

    After persuading myself to write a book, which I've been struggling with for a couple of months, if not, years now. I'm doing pretty well, just in need of a couple of names.

    In case you were wondering what kind of book, here is a summary I wrote a couple of weeks ago.

    Code:
    It all started in the 16th century, when a young boy was born. 
    
    His name was Martin von Nobia. 
    
    He was a very peculiar boy, but he grew up in a normal neighbourhood. 
    His father was a blacksmith, specialised in making weapons and armor for the Army of a small town, which location is still unknown till today. 
    
    His mother, no information on her other than the fact that she died when he was born. 
    
    Martin grew up, gotten older, gotten wiser. Gotten stronger, gotten smarter. He was the perfect kid to have. He grew up to be a soldier, to be a defender of the country he lived in. But strange and odd things happened. 
    When he was 6, his father gave him a little dagger to play with. He threw it away immediately. He didn't like the feel, color and shine which the dagger gave. No, he wanted a sword, forged from the heart of a meteorite. 
    
    A sword forged with the heart of the meteorite, and the purest, most refined black steel. Yeah, that's what he wanted. 
    
    He waited for 3 years, he grew up to be a mastermind. 
    He deepened himself in the art of meditation, and he became one with his mind, body and soul. He also became one with the universe - which was unknown to him for years. 
    
    A meteorite struck, and nothing but the core was left of it. 
    His father was dieing of cancer, but he granted his son his last wish. 
    He forged the sword, and with the last strike, he fell. 
    
    Martin buried his own father, but he didn't even let a single tear fall down to the ground, no. 
    He let his sword absorb those tears. 
    
    For 2 years, he lived in agony and despair. 
    A child of 9, and yet, he survived. 
    He taught himself how to handle a sword, and he fought. He taught himself how to communicate with animals, and he ate. He taught himself to listen, and he found water. 
    
    Years struck past, and he became a Demi-God. 
    His skills with the sword were exceeding every other swordsman, his eyes saw further than the eyes of a hawk, he heard better than dogs could, and he was faster than a cheetah. 
    
    His friends, his people. They all admired him. 
    His foes, his enemies. They were afraid of him. 
    
    He became the king of the country he lived in, and they all lived in peace. 
    He fell in love with the love of his life - Dynam. 
    
    They got married, and at the age of 21, Martin had gotten his first child, a girl, called VoŽl'Ta. 
    
    At the age of 23, his wife gave birth to a twin. They were named: Kravertus and Krabor. 
    
    Martin spent a lot of time with his children, and as everybody expected, they lived up to their father. 
    They became as smart, strong and aesthetic as their father was. 
    
    Until the sad day came. 
    
    Martin was 28, VoŽl'Ta was 7, Kravertus and Krabor were 5. 
    Dark clouds were everywhere, thunder struck from Europe to America. 
    
    Golgan'no came. 
    
    Golgan'no was the exact counterpart of Martin, yet, their skills matched equally. 
    
    Golgan'no was sent by the lord of Death himself, to punish Martin of being an insolent brat. Death was afraid, because Martin had surpassed him in power, skills, knowledge, intellect, and many other aspects. 
    
    However, Martin had a wife and three kids to look after, and when he tried to get them to safety, Golgan'no struck, and he fell his wife, he felled his kids, and he had stung Martin right through his chest. 
    
    Martin fell on his knees, wondering how this could've happened. 
    He went into the deepest meditation there is - split from body and soul. 
    He cried out for help in the widest universe, with no response.. 
    He screamed for help, yet, no response.. 
    
    He cried, and he immediately knew what to do. 
    
    He gathered the powers of what he had worked for so long. 
    He became one with the nature, one with the Earth, one with the universe. 
    
    His armor turned purple, his sword started to shine bright. 
    He reached out, pulled the sword of Golgan'no out of his chest, and stuck his own sword in. 
    
    The core of the meteorite began to forge with his heart, and they became one. 
    
    He then became a God. 
    
    He stood up, floated away, and He flew towards the Sun. 
    He reached out for everyone, and He emitted a large glowing bowl of purple light - the essence of Von Nobia. 
    
    All fear, despair and agony fell back to where they came from, and there was an explosion of Light. 
    
    The Light of Von Nobia. 
    Golgan'no dispersed into the light, with Martin himself. 
    
    And they vanished. 
    
    
    
    From that day onwards, nobody ever spoke about the Von Nobia clan again. 
    
    Until today. 
    
    
    
    I am Martin Kravertus Krabor VoŽl'ta von Nobia. And I am the true ascendent of God. I will deliver the world hope, I will grant the world peace. There will be no war, no fear, no agony and despair anymore. No. 
    
    The Von Nobia clan will rise - once again, to beat Death himself. 
    
    And I shall lead this army. 
    
    
    
    
    ©Martin Kravertus Krabor VoŽl'ta von Nobia. 30-9-2011 1:56 AM GMT+1
    I'm in need of names for people.

    Names I've got so far:
    -Martin
    -Kravertus
    -Krabor
    -VoŽl'ta
    -Krantus
    -›zal
    -Verifirtur
    -Hayana (Actually the town's name, but oh well)
    -Yrza.

    I'm looking for names, a bit in the theme of this.

    I would seriously love it if you would help, and I would try to come up with some sort of compensation (PP $$ ?)

    Yours faithfully, Martin von Nobia.

  2. #2
    Atrox's Avatar
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    Fantasy Name Generator <- name generator

    so, iv'e read the story, quite interesting though its pretty rough, as some transitions do not match and your ways of expressing shit (sorry if i'm not that literate right now, quite sleepy)

    as in here

    "His skills with the sword were exceeding every other swordsman, his eyes saw further than the eyes of a hawk, he heard better than dogs could, and he was faster than a cheetah. "

    this sentence can really be improved on, lemme try.

    "His sword skills that of a true master that no one could surpass with exceptional sight and hearing impaired by nothing, superior to anything in terms of speed."

    can't do any better right now.
    Last edited by Atrox; 11-11-2011 at 06:46 PM.



  3. #3
    .Amnesia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Atrox View Post
    Fantasy Name Generator <- name generator

    so, iv'e read the story, quite interesting though its pretty rough, as some transitions do not match and your ways of expressing shit (sorry if i'm not that literate right now, quite sleepy)

    as in here

    "His skills with the sword were exceeding every other swordsman, his eyes saw further than the eyes of a hawk, he heard better than dogs could, and he was faster than a cheetah. "

    this sentence can really be improved on, lemme try.

    "His sword skills that of a true master that no one could surpass with exceptional sight and hearing impaired by nothing, superior to anything in terms of speed."

    can't do any better right now.
    Thanks for the help mate!

    But yeah, that was pretty bad-ass!
    English isn't my native language, so yeah, I've got a lot to fix when I'm done.
    But that sentence sure was a lot better than mine, and I thank you for that!

  4. #4
    Atrox's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by .Amnesia View Post


    Thanks for the help mate!

    But yeah, that was pretty bad-ass!
    English isn't my native language, so yeah, I've got a lot to fix when I'm done.
    But that sentence sure was a lot better than mine, and I thank you for that!
    lol no problem, english aint my native language either, i do know how to speak 4 languages though...



  5. #5
    Occidi de Pax's Avatar
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    i would help you but i cant read light green text ...
    Music historian here to please and displease,learning to teach all you peeps,so stop by the music part of the forum,and ask the question to your needs.

  6. #6
    .Amnesia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Atrox View Post


    lol no problem, english aint my native language either, i do know how to speak 4 languages though...



    Quote Originally Posted by ultimateon View Post
    i would help you but i cant read light green text ...
    I don't see light green text in here..

  7. #7
    Atrox's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by .Amnesia View Post





    I don't see light green text in here..

    ignore that idiot, his intelligence level is lower than a dead turtle.
    Last edited by Atrox; 11-12-2011 at 01:55 PM.



  8. #8
    DenialS.'s Avatar
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    Seems pretty Good... Its clear!!!
    Credits go to Invalid_Username. Thanks bro!




    PotHeads hang here: http://www.mpgh.net/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=170

  9. #9
    jerry0503214's Avatar
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    this sentence can really be improved on, lemme try.

    "His sword skills that of a true master that no one could surpass with exceptional sight and hearing impaired by nothing, superior to anything in terms of speed."

    can't do any better right now.









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  10. #10
    The power of the imagination makes us infinite.
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    meteorite warrior.
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  11. #11
    Scruffy's Avatar
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    the true ascendant of God?

    ...what?

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