Yeah i said earlier, ive been in the military environment most of my life, so i have lived many places, the majority being in the middle east, which is why i made the claim talking about going to sleep to gun shots and bombings right down the street it sounds like, and when you're walking down the street you have to worry about trigger happy and excited young recruits into the street soldier ranks, and the US, and was only recently sent back to the US a year ago. And Yes, the US has the most crimes population wise. But many of these crimes don't affect a population of more than a few people, and the majority aren't even violent. While in the middle east these crimes do affect the larger population, are more often than not violent, and they decrease the standard of living in those countries. And i agree with you that the presence of such a large armed forces increases crime rate and , in my opinion, it not only increases the availability of weapons to the general population but it takes the young kids off from the real low down environment's, they already have that feeling of invincibility that most young adults have, and then puts a gun in their hand, which boosts that " i cant die, not me" sense, and then sets them back out on the street, where more likely than not, they now have a passion for guns and the power they give them. Which spreads to others, and the reason that violence goes up with this as well, is that it makes killing someone so easy, almost unreal when you do it from a distance, so it reduces the sense of consequence and remorse extremely. But damn i got off topic, anyways, and yes i agree with you that democracy CAN be done, and i agree with you that its the choice of the people of the country, but i believe that most people aren't ready for it yet.
You said something about the civil war and structuring,
during the civil war the U.S was not stable whatsoever, after the war, it increased structure and stability greatly. So maybe the middle east will get through this war, possibly with decreasing fossil fuel necessity being a boost, and if the U.S stops trying to shove democracy down their throats, they will adopt a modified version of how the run things now, and things will start to run smoothly again after a few years and eventually possibly switch over to democracy on their own. One problem standing in their way i believe is the U.S and its whole "God" ego going on. Solve everything Fix everything, the problem with that is that if we involve ourselves to much we become a crutch to the nation/nations we are trying to help.
Sorry if i strayed from what you were saying but i had difficulty understanding everything in your post.