Meeting my crush's mom tomorrow.

[-Madara_Uchihã-]

Make up your religion too, for the story about how you guys met, choose something you guys both like in common, for example if a couple both like comics, inb4 meets at comicon.

I just don't want to lie to her, it'll start me off on a bad foot.

Is her name Amy?

Anyways... going to church 3-4 times weekly?! that's a bit excessive imo and I'm Christian lol

For the how you met up bit, say you met at school or something.

I thought about that, but for certain circumstances I won't say, it won't work.

Tell her you met her on a jesus chatline.

This will be my Plan B.

Tell her you met ur crush at the church.
At table all you have to do is

This is probably the best advice I've seen on this thread.

Well if you really liked the girl you would tell her mom your christian, and then when you to got married you could tell her the truth so that it would be to late for her to do anything about it. Also just tell her that you and her both went to a wedding engagement of a friend you both knew from the church she goes to, easy as that. good luck buddy.

Uhm...... O.o

lie to her mom.

I'm trying to avoid that if possible.

Alright, here's a guideline.

First of all, show up 30 minutes late to let that bitch know who's the fucking man and that she is just an insignificant woman who you are only meeting because you want to smash her daughter into oblivion.

Next, show up wearing a snapback or truefitted hat sideways saying "STRAIGHT UP NIGGA". You're apparel will also need to consist of ripped jeans and you'll need the zipper to be down so your dick is just visible to the wife's husband showing the massive size of the penis once again showing who the man in the house is and also making the husband feel insecure. You're shirt should say "KING KONG AIN'T GOT NOTHIN ON ME".

Thirdly, you'll need to let your Body odour dominate the room so people know your present and know that you're a person to be reckoned with. You'll need to be wearing some brand new nikes so that she knows your shoes were made by people in her 3rd world broke ass country and that the people who made it were slaved and beaten and one of them were possibly related to her, most likely a distant cousin.

The last step is to make sure you make the girl you like to sit beside her and have a knife to her side and tell her to start stroking your dick or you'll stab her, and "accidently" drop your fork and make her mom pick it up and as she leans down make sure she see's what her daughter is doing to you.

This guide will get you pussy and make the pussy's mom love you.

This shall be my final resort

use a condom for that 3some

Gross

Start going out to church with her mom, she will start to like you.

I'd really choose not to.

[Dreamer.JR]

read this How to Be a Christian: 11 steps - wikiHow

[PyrexxHero®]

When you meet her mom, pull out your dick

[Color]

I just don't want to lie to her, it'll start me off on a bad foot.



I thought about that, but for certain circumstances I won't say, it won't work.



This will be my Plan B.



This is probably the best advice I've seen on this thread.



Uhm...... O.o

I'm trying to avoid that if possible.



This shall be my final resort



Gross

I'd really choose not to.

What? my way was probably the smartest.

[Hux]

I just don't want to lie to her, it'll start me off on a bad foot.



I thought about that, but for certain circumstances I won't say, it won't work.



This will be my Plan B.



This is probably the best advice I've seen on this thread.



Uhm...... O.o

I'm trying to avoid that if possible.



This shall be my final resort



Gross

I'd really choose not to.

your going to have to go the extra mile if you really like this girl.

[Canadian]

This shall be my final resort

Good, we can also arrange to get one of those ear things and we can talk through it and I'll guide you through your date.

Call me at 911.

[crex]

I just don't want to lie to her, it'll start me off on a bad foot.



I thought about that, but for certain circumstances I won't say, it won't work.



This will be my Plan B.



This is probably the best advice I've seen on this thread.



Uhm...... O.o

I'm trying to avoid that if possible.



This shall be my final resort



Gross

I'd really choose not to.

Then don't bring it up until she does and when she does say something along the lines of I was an atheist for a while but I think I'm slowly leaning towards Christianity.

[Lehsyrus]

So there's this girl I've known for about two years, and I have feelings for her. We meet on a chat site (that I don't remember) and we've been talking on and off, but it wasn't until about 6 months ago that we started to get serious. She's currently under LEGAL age (16) and I'm 18, but the only reason I want to meet her mother is because her mom is sort of strict on who she gets to hang out with. I feel if I can get on her mom's good side she will let us be together. We've already been on two dates, one was during the Dominican Parade in NYC, and the other I took her out to eat, movies, walked her home, kissed, etc.

But here are some of my concerns:
- Her mom is pure Dominican, she knows very little to no English at all. Spanish is not my 1st language, but I can speak it at a.. below average level.
- Her mom is also a HARDCORE Christian, I'm talking "Jesus Saves" bumper stickers and Church 3-4 times weekly. I'm an Atheist, and I feel at some point at the dinner table she's going to ask me about my religious beliefs. If I were to tell her that I don't believe in her deity, that she so strongly believes in, she won't allow us to be together.
- I need to make up a story of how she and I met.

Advice please?

NOTE: Because this is General I am expecting a few troll responses, but I ask that you guys try and be serious?

You are now a Christian. You prefer personal devotion and study over group study and that is why you do not attend Church. You believe the Bible is based on historical facts as well moral story. Your English is impeccable and you are a gentleman. When she first see's you, your first words are "Hello miss, I am [FULL NAME], it is a pleasure to meet you" while smiling and give a very slight bow. As you walk into the house you take off your shoes and politely ask where to put them. Before eating dinner you remember that Christian-fanatics say grace. You keep your head bowed (do not put your chin to your chest but about two inches away), eyes closed, and hands together. You keep your elbows off of the table.

When she talks to you about your future, you be honest, however you add in you also want to pursue your degree in Entrepreneurship to own your own business in whatever you actually want to Major in. Your grades are A's and B's with the majority being A's.

If she drops something, pick it up for her. Help her do the dishes. Ask if there is anything else you can do to help. Be very polite to her daughter in front of her. Do not look at her daughter for longer than three seconds whilst her daughter is not speaking. Face her and look her in the eye whilst talking to her.



If you do not wish to lie to her about your religion, stretch it. You are now agnostic. Explain to her that you believe that there is a higher deity out there, but you have yet to understand it. That you are willing to pursue research behind the subject. Shit like that.
Do you know how easy it is to get hardass moms to like you? Hell, if a guy looking like me can do it, so can you. It takes being polite, as well as intelligent.

[.REZ]

Lie, lie, lie.

[Bernard]

You are now a Christian. You prefer personal devotion and study over group study and that is why you do not attend Church. You believe the Bible is based on historical facts as well moral story. Your English is impeccable and you are a gentleman. When she first see's you, your first words are "Hello miss, I am [FULL NAME], it is a pleasure to meet you" while smiling and give a very slight bow. As you walk into the house you take off your shoes and politely ask where to put them. Before eating dinner you remember that Christian-fanatics say grace. You keep your head bowed (do not put your chin to your chest but about two inches away), eyes closed, and hands together. You keep your elbows off of the table.

When she talks to you about your future, you be honest, however you add in you also want to pursue your degree in Entrepreneurship to own your own business in whatever you actually want to Major in. Your grades are A's and B's with the majority being A's.

If she drops something, pick it up for her. Help her do the dishes. Ask if there is anything else you can do to help. Be very polite to her daughter in front of her. Do not look at her daughter for longer than three seconds whilst her daughter is not speaking. Face her and look her in the eye whilst talking to her.



If you do not wish to lie to her about your religion, stretch it. You are now agnostic. Explain to her that you believe that there is a higher deity out there, but you have yet to understand it. That you are willing to pursue research behind the subject. Shit like that.
Do you know how easy it is to get hardass moms to like you? Hell, if a guy looking like me can do it, so can you. It takes being polite, as well as intelligent.

Does your knowledge ever end?...

[KingDot]

@Dr. Sheldon Cooper

I suggest that you shouldn't lie about your relationship. Her mom will eventually find out sooner or later.

The thing is, don't lie. But be polite about it. Respect your religion and maybe she will respect your opinion. Calling yourself an atheist isn't a thing. It's a title. Nothing more. You CHOOSE to label yourself as an atheist, but really it's just a chosen. I suggest you read some things about Christianity (bible, etc) to familiarize yourself though. Don't bring up your religion unless she brings it up.

Also, learn some simple Spanish phrases that will make you not look like a complete idiot. If you plan to take this seriously, make sure you don't look like an idiot. She wouldn't want her daughter to marry some idiot that has no respect for anything whatsoever.

But most of all, be polite. Even if she offends you anyway, be polite. Shrug it off. Just make sure not to offend her in anyway.

Again, don't take what I say seriously. I'm not telling you to do this or do that. This is just an advice. Not an order.

Best of luck

[[SMA] Paradise`]

This shit is like the show Extreme Cougar Wives.

[Canadian]

You are now a Christian. You prefer personal devotion and study over group study and that is why you do not attend Church. You believe the Bible is based on historical facts as well moral story. Your English is impeccable and you are a gentleman. When she first see's you, your first words are "Hello miss, I am [FULL NAME], it is a pleasure to meet you" while smiling and give a very slight bow. As you walk into the house you take off your shoes and politely ask where to put them. Before eating dinner you remember that Christian-fanatics say grace. You keep your head bowed (do not put your chin to your chest but about two inches away), eyes closed, and hands together. You keep your elbows off of the table.

When she talks to you about your future, you be honest, however you add in you also want to pursue your degree in Entrepreneurship to own your own business in whatever you actually want to Major in. Your grades are A's and B's with the majority being A's.

If she drops something, pick it up for her. Help her do the dishes. Ask if there is anything else you can do to help. Be very polite to her daughter in front of her. Do not look at her daughter for longer than three seconds whilst her daughter is not speaking. Face her and look her in the eye whilst talking to her.



If you do not wish to lie to her about your religion, stretch it. You are now agnostic. Explain to her that you believe that there is a higher deity out there, but you have yet to understand it. That you are willing to pursue research behind the subject. Shit like that.
Do you know how easy it is to get hardass moms to like you? Hell, if a guy looking like me can do it, so can you. It takes being polite, as well as intelligent.

ORRRRRR you can just slap the bitch and say you're going to fuck her daughter.

[-Madara_Uchihã-]

You are now a Christian. You prefer personal devotion and study over group study and that is why you do not attend Church. You believe the Bible is based on historical facts as well moral story. Your English is impeccable and you are a gentleman. When she first see's you, your first words are "Hello miss, I am [FULL NAME], it is a pleasure to meet you" while smiling and give a very slight bow. As you walk into the house you take off your shoes and politely ask where to put them. Before eating dinner you remember that Christian-fanatics say grace. You keep your head bowed (do not put your chin to your chest but about two inches away), eyes closed, and hands together. You keep your elbows off of the table.

When she talks to you about your future, you be honest, however you add in you also want to pursue your degree in Entrepreneurship to own your own business in whatever you actually want to Major in. Your grades are A's and B's with the majority being A's.

If she drops something, pick it up for her. Help her do the dishes. Ask if there is anything else you can do to help. Be very polite to her daughter in front of her. Do not look at her daughter for longer than three seconds whilst her daughter is not speaking. Face her and look her in the eye whilst talking to her.



If you do not wish to lie to her about your religion, stretch it. You are now agnostic. Explain to her that you believe that there is a higher deity out there, but you have yet to understand it. That you are willing to pursue research behind the subject. Shit like that.
Do you know how easy it is to get hardass moms to like you? Hell, if a guy looking like me can do it, so can you. It takes being polite, as well as intelligent.

It isn't the first time I've met her, but the 1st time was more like a Hi-Bye kind of thing. And I've taken mental notes of everything you said, but most of the middle paragraph I though all guys did that? o.o

@Dr. Sheldon Cooper

I suggest that you shouldn't lie about your relationship. Her mom will eventually find out sooner or later.

The thing is, don't lie. But be polite about it. Respect your religion and maybe she will respect your opinion. Calling yourself an atheist isn't a thing. It's a title. Nothing more. You CHOOSE to label yourself as an atheist, but really it's just a chosen. I suggest you read some things about Christianity (bible, etc) to familiarize yourself though. Don't bring up your religion unless she brings it up.

Also, learn some simple Spanish phrases that will make you not look like a complete idiot. If you plan to take this seriously, make sure you don't look like an idiot. She wouldn't want her daughter to marry some idiot that has no respect for anything whatsoever.

But most of all, be polite. Even if she offends you anyway, be polite. Shrug it off. Just make sure not to offend her in anyway.

Again, don't take what I say seriously. I'm not telling you to do this or do that. This is just an advice. Not an order.

Best of luck

We aren't a couple YET, that's why I want to meet her mom before we get together to get off on the right foot. And as for the 2nd part I used to be a Catholic for about 15 years, then Christian for a year, and I've been an Atheist for the past two years. As for he Spanish, I'm Dominican-American. I can hold a basic conversation but i'm going to attempt to get her to level with me on my Spanish.


For the record (for both posts): I do not intend to bring up religion at all, in fact I'm trying to avoid the subject all together. But I just want a back up plan in the high possibility she brings it up.

EDIT: @KingDot I apologize if my response came off as Flaming, that wasn't my intention, I was just clarifying. if

[Raple]

I would make a huge wall of text giving you advice, but I choose not to let Canadian reply to advice again XD