When you think about giving your hard earned money away in the form of Candy to little children with snot rolling down their cheeks, you feel disgusted with yourself. Some people even dress up to hide their shame. Why not make it a new tradition though? Instead of thinking about it as giving away candy, when you open the door, start pelting the children with candy, and think of it as a day to assault children with sugary goods without getting in real trouble, from the comfort of your own home. Hey, we all assault little children every day on this site, why not do it in REAL LIFE!? Maybe get the old vacuum cleaner out, turn it on reverse, and fill the tube with small candies. When the door is opened, let loose and fire salvos of sugar towards the unsuspecting children. Pretend chip bags are grenades, complete with sound effects and all. One of two things will happen;
1) Everyone will avoid the house from then on, thus saving the candy for your own enjoyment.
2) You will be the main attraction, and you will have the pleasure of continuously assaulting bratty children with no legal repercussions.
Have yourselves a GREAT Halloween MPGH. Candy, and physical assault all around.
The problem is that we're people. People are shitty beings, you just gotta keep that in mind.
"Science is interesting, and if you don't agree you can fuck off." - Richard Dawkins "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." - Albert Einstein
Originally Posted by Lehsyrus
Troll nomination. Allah and Muhammad for 1400 years of bullshit.