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  1. #16
    Sir Nathan's Avatar
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    Came in her mouth. She slapped me and said I was a prick. I replied 'Nay, I am not a prick. I have a prick. You just sucked it.' Then she slapped me even harder and I said 'why then if you would suck with the same enthusiasm that you slap, this would've been over minutes ago.' Kind of awkward ever since after that- I have to see her everyday at school.
    God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy.

  2. #17
    Austin's Avatar
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    itt: kids fronting

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QvmrROz7Plo




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  3. #18
    Azathᴏth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scata View Post
    itt: kids fronting
    stfu and tell us awkward sex story. :F

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cthulhu View Post


    stfu and tell us awkward sex story. :F

    k, fine. one time i was bangin this really fat chick like 800 pounds and she sticks her thumb up my butt and swirls me around and throws me.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QvmrROz7Plo




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  5. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scata View Post



    k, fine. one time i was bangin this really fat chick like 800 pounds and she sticks her thumb up my butt and swirls me around and throws me.
    seems legit .

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    "well ain't dat sum shit. Sucks for you, but you did well professionally, and nobody can ever say you would be shit at any future positions. But you just gotta know when to not fuck up, or just go the silent mod route like tommi, or ravallo, or nico." - Doc


    Quote Originally Posted by Illuminarly View Post
    Did you refresh the thread and see my comment? No way you replied that quickly


  6. #21
    Mr. Lonely's Avatar
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    I haven't had sex for awhile now, like 5 going on to 6 years & I only ever had sex with one person but this is my "awkward" stories.

    Kissing in the dark, when I end up making out with his chin or nose
    The first time he put it in , he came . & his excuse was "I can't do this ".
    69ing when I'm bottom and get a view of his ass crack
    When he's going down on me and I have tissue residue in my vagj.
    When I start crying because it hurts and he stops and comforts me
    After having sex in the dark we turn on the light to find a period stain on his sheets
    When he came in my mouth without telling me and someone walks in and starts talking to us
    My fake orgies, YEAH . ITS PRETTY AWKWARD.
    When he ties my hands up and goes down on me thinking I can't set them free when i really i easily can but i just pretend I can't.
    When he blows into my vagj and pushes on my tummy so I queef.
    When he was drunk and I was tipsy he put it in my asshole and immediately i went into fetus position with my hands cupping my ass. (That shit fucking hurts, it's like chucking a huge dump and ripping your asshole, but more like a huge dump is going up in your hole and ripping it.)
    When we're having shower sex and he gets angry when i try to wank him with the soap (apparently it dries up and stings later)
    When we're having hot bath sex and riding him in the water creates waves which splashes on his face and in his mouth (ew drity sex water)
    When he cums and I take a piece of tissue and try to wipe the cum away, and tissue ends up getting stuck to his knob
    Moaned my best friends name instead of his , (they had similar names).
    Having sex and the bed breaks (Yes this did seriously happen)
    He had a really bad fever but i still gave him a bj, which later on he then puked instead of cumming.
    When my mind drifts to something else during sex
    When he pounded me so hard i fell off the bed, crying.
    & many many more. ...

    But during these times when it happened nothing felt " really awkward" we'd normally just laugh it off and get more intimate and I didn't mind and neither did he, besides my fake orgies, that personally was awkward for me.

    _<span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span><span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span>_


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  8. #22
    Azathᴏth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Lonely View Post
    I haven't had sex for awhile now, like 5 going on to 6 years & I only ever had sex with one person but this is my "awkward" stories.

    Kissing in the dark, when I end up making out with his chin or nose
    The first time he put it in , he came . & his excuse was "I can't do this ".
    69ing when I'm bottom and get a view of his ass crack
    When he's going down on me and I have tissue residue in my vagj.
    When I start crying because it hurts and he stops and comforts me
    After having sex in the dark we turn on the light to find a period stain on his sheets
    When he came in my mouth without telling me and someone walks in and starts talking to us
    My fake orgies, YEAH . ITS PRETTY AWKWARD.
    When he ties my hands up and goes down on me thinking I can't set them free when i really i easily can but i just pretend I can't.
    When he blows into my vagj and pushes on my tummy so I queef.
    When he was drunk and I was tipsy he put it in my asshole and immediately i went into fetus position with my hands cupping my ass. (That shit fucking hurts, it's like chucking a huge dump and ripping your asshole, but more like a huge dump is going up in your hole and ripping it.)
    When we're having shower sex and he gets angry when i try to wank him with the soap (apparently it dries up and stings later)
    When we're having hot bath sex and riding him in the water creates waves which splashes on his face and in his mouth (ew drity sex water)
    When he cums and I take a piece of tissue and try to wipe the cum away, and tissue ends up getting stuck to his knob
    Moaned my best friends name instead of his , (they had similar names).
    Having sex and the bed breaks (Yes this did seriously happen)
    He had a really bad fever but i still gave him a bj, which later on he then puked instead of cumming.
    When my mind drifts to something else during sex
    When he pounded me so hard i fell off the bed, crying.
    & many many more. ...

    But during these times when it happened nothing felt " really awkward" we'd normally just laugh it off and get more intimate and I didn't mind and neither did he, besides my fake orgies, that personally was awkward for me.
    tl;dr


  9. #23
    Mr. Lonely's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cthulhu View Post


    tl;dr

    Here's it in a simpler form

    I'm a virgin.
    Last edited by Mr. Lonely; 04-15-2012 at 12:06 AM.

    _<span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span><span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span> <span class="EmojiInput mj230" title="Black Heart Suit ::hearts::"></span>_


  10. #24
    InHuman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cthulhu View Post


    You told me this one time.

    a that shit was funny

  11. #25
    Azathᴏth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Lonely View Post


    Here's it in a simpler form

    I'm a virgin.
    Oh ok, because I had some retarded in my eyes for a moment and had a lot of trouble reading all that pink text.

  12. #26
    InHuman's Avatar
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    minas are funny as a mofo /aha ahahaha

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    Mr. Lonely (04-15-2012)

  14. #27
    Physcadelic's Avatar
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    Holy shit Mina that was funny.

    For me it was probably the time I lost my virginity.. during the day, on a beach. Sex on a beach is supposed to be romantic and shit but it is anything but. So we were going at it, and I heard this loud noise behind me, I turn around and see a beach-patrol helicopter flying over us, and looking down on me. We were the only people on the beach (obviously) so we weren't exactly hard to spot. I really hope that guy didn't recognise me or anything

    R.I.P a great GM




    Quote Originally Posted by Assalamu alaikum View Post
    what? maybe stop talk with riddles and with words i am not even know.

  15. #28
    Royce's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Lonely View Post
    I haven't had sex for awhile now, like 5 going on to 6 years & I only ever had sex with one person but this is my "awkward" stories.

    Kissing in the dark, when I end up making out with his chin or nose
    The first time he put it in , he came . & his excuse was "I can't do this ".
    69ing when I'm bottom and get a view of his ass crack
    When he's going down on me and I have tissue residue in my vagj.
    When I start crying because it hurts and he stops and comforts me
    After having sex in the dark we turn on the light to find a period stain on his sheets
    When he came in my mouth without telling me and someone walks in and starts talking to us
    My fake orgies, YEAH . ITS PRETTY AWKWARD.
    When he ties my hands up and goes down on me thinking I can't set them free when i really i easily can but i just pretend I can't.
    When he blows into my vagj and pushes on my tummy so I queef.
    When he was drunk and I was tipsy he put it in my asshole and immediately i went into fetus position with my hands cupping my ass. (That shit fucking hurts, it's like chucking a huge dump and ripping your asshole, but more like a huge dump is going up in your hole and ripping it.)
    When we're having shower sex and he gets angry when i try to wank him with the soap (apparently it dries up and stings later)
    When we're having hot bath sex and riding him in the water creates waves which splashes on his face and in his mouth (ew drity sex water)
    When he cums and I take a piece of tissue and try to wipe the cum away, and tissue ends up getting stuck to his knob
    Moaned my best friends name instead of his , (they had similar names).
    Having sex and the bed breaks (Yes this did seriously happen)
    He had a really bad fever but i still gave him a bj, which later on he then puked instead of cumming.
    When my mind drifts to something else during sex
    When he pounded me so hard i fell off the bed, crying.
    & many many more. ...

    But during these times when it happened nothing felt " really awkward" we'd normally just laugh it off and get more intimate and I didn't mind and neither did he, besides my fake orgies, that personally was awkward for me.
    What dafuq I just read

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    "well ain't dat sum shit. Sucks for you, but you did well professionally, and nobody can ever say you would be shit at any future positions. But you just gotta know when to not fuck up, or just go the silent mod route like tommi, or ravallo, or nico." - Doc


    Quote Originally Posted by Illuminarly View Post
    Did you refresh the thread and see my comment? No way you replied that quickly


  16. #29
    Azathᴏth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Royce da 5'9" View Post


    you never had that experience .

    when i had to stop to go pee
    The only thing you've ever fucked is your hand.

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  18. #30
    Doc's Avatar
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    Most awkward moment was when he pooped a little.

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