Thread: Its Time...

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  1. #1
    Assistive's Avatar
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    Its Time...

    Over the past week or so I have been talking about the stuff I do with my girlfriend. I talked about how we have sex all the time and got high in the woods. I talked about how I don't like to use condoms when I have sex with her because I can't feel anything. The list can keep going but I feel that this is a good place to end it. The truth is I don't have a girlfriend. I'm a 19 year old virgin that gets off to watching people get rape. The only thing that I have had sex with are my hands. My hands were the ones that are there for me when I get hard. My hands were there when I saw my first internet porno. My hands are there when I need to make a sandwich. My hands are always there for me. My hands don't reject me, they love me. That is why I feel that I will never need a girlfriend ever. My hands can do almost all that a girl can do and I don't have to cuddle with them after sex.

    I have decided that the time in my life has come and I proposed to my hands last night. They were so shocked that no words were said, but instead we had sex. I'm taking that as a yes. I have set up a wedding date for January 5, 2014 and all of MPGH is invited. Please feel free to invite any of your friends or family, all are welcome to this magical event.

    I want to give a huge thanks to
    @Dave84311
    @Hero
    @arunforce
    @Liz
    For making it all possible.

    I would also like to mention 2 people that never flamed me
    @Aborted
    -and-
    @Brinley

    Now for the haters:
    @HeroicXPharaoh
    @iTzSeyeko
    @unknownartist0
    @thingHACKER
    @Lightning
    @Ahmad
    Last edited by Trevor Phillips; 10-02-2013 at 06:15 PM.

    "Dab is a Shitposting Retard" - Boombox 2016
     


  2. #2
    Dakota's Avatar
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    Congrats for 3k inb4flame

  3. #3
    Skipsy's Avatar
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    happy 3k fgt

  4. #4
    Euphemistic's Avatar
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    Want to meet myra? My right nut. HUE.

    #Awkward Post Ban Thread.

    Congratz on 3k fgt and go get a fucking girlfriend FFS.

  5. #5
    Aborted's Avatar
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    Enjoi & His Hands:
    A Love Story
    I am the seer in the dark,
    the vagabond of yore,
    valediction.
    I am the sum of all your parts,
    and proprietor of all.
    A miasma,
    the conclusion,
    blackmonger of Inlé,
    valediction.
    Synapses fray,
    my form now vivid,
    as torpor sets and blood grows tepid.
    With every ounce of flesh now offered,
    I hold your corpse within my coffers.
    Knitted cells now split asunder,
    stand alongside me brother.
    Take your place amongst my Owsla,
    we march at dawn now and forever.


  6. #6
    Bernard.'s Avatar
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    Congratz on 3k. But the post is true.
    Rep. Power: 111

    Minion: 11/28/12-3/15/14

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    Ameer's Avatar
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    Dis new phags post bans are weird .

    League of Legends Minion - 08/25/16


  8. #8
    Predator's Avatar
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    Grats on the 3k
























    MPGH Member Since: 2011
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  9. #9
    Mr.Seyeko's Avatar
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    Gah damn you are one weird anorexic little boy.


  10. #10
    Skipsy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iTzSeyeko View Post
    Gah damn you are one weird anorexic little boy.
    Shouldn't you be sucking cocks instead of posting?

  11. #11
    Raple's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cornerpath View Post
    I NEED TO HELP PEOPLE IN HOUSTON TX UNBAN ME I don't deserve to be banned ever! I am damn near A perfect users do I look like "Dildotheking" to you guys??? I can see him being banned this long but not me!
    Quote Originally Posted by cornerpath View Post
    I am not very happy about this. Now I have to live with two infractions for the rest of my LIFE!! Over a little spamming. That's like me going to jail for 934563498 years for jaywalking. Now I have to hang and chat with the other low lives with infractions!!!!
    Quote Originally Posted by cornerpath View Post
    Hello, I would like to request Admin for A day. I have been in leader positions in certain things such as Roblox So I would hope you guys let me one day get od or Admin for A day
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    Do not deal with this DEMON!!!!
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    THIS GUY IS THE DEVIL!!! TRIED TO SCAM ME!


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  12. #12
    Skipsy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Raple Syrup View Post
    Says the guy with the Justin Beiber hairdo.

  13. #13
    carbonnade's Avatar
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    Grats and also wtf...

  14. #14
    BoxHead1080's Avatar
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    Gratz on 3k.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Skipsy View Post


    Says the guy with the Justin Beiber hairdo.
    Kid you suck dick in real life and enjoy it, why are you talking shit? fucking hypocrite at its finest.


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