Thread: The Invincible

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  1. #1
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    The Invincible

    Ok this is a story i been writing for like 4 years like every now and then i'd pop on, the first few paragraphs are when i was like 10 =/...yah kinda sucks but ...

    The Invincible
    (Small preview)

    It was a rainy morning at 4:00 when John’s 18 year old son, Kieran, would be out playing, John suddenly heard… “BANG!” he sprung up flung on his police suit, knowing the bang would be from the murderer who killed nearly every soul in New York. He walked down the alleyway and suddenly came face to face with a suspect wearing a black hoodie and a gun. He knew he was face to face with the murderer otherwise known as “The Invincible”. He felt a cold shiver run down his spine, but then found out he was the last policeman alive and had to save his city. He drew out his gun, before he shot; he asked the murderer ‘Who are you? Take off that hoodie’ the suspect sniggered ‘no’.

    The policemen aimed and shot but the murder surprisingly dodged the shot, in a matter of seconds the murderer took his hoodie off and shot John as he just got a glimpse of who the murderer was….

    A couple of weeks later John (the policeman) was in hospital likely to be on his death bed, he was alive…well he had a pulse and a heart beat, the nurse instantly told the wife, John beckoned her over with his struggling arm ‘It was him’ he whispered ‘…, I…saw him shoot me…Kieran’. ‘Well your injured who else will kill him?’ she said in surprise ‘who said my career’s ended…’ he said with a slight wink.

    The nurse told John that he had to stay for another week before he can leave, so that’s what he did…
    1 week later john was at home doing his daily routine, still recovering from his injury. Until suddenly he thought “why did he shoot me once?”...He asked his wife, she said “it’s because he is your son, he loves you deep deep inside…”

    1 month later John was back doing his job still doing the police investigation of Kieran otherwise known as John’s son or otherwise known as “The Invincible” John’s boss told him that he has to kill his son, but having in mind that his son didn’t want kill him, he wont kill his son.

    John heard that 1783 more people have died in New York, he now just wants to know what his son wants…Is it revenge over something or just wants to kill people.

    1 Year later half of New York has been murdered and a quarter of them have simply left the country, Kieran hadn’t come home due to the obvious reason, he shot his dad. But not so long ago, Kieran came in and took all his clothes and other accessories; it’s time to find out what he wants…

    The morning after, John went out on a search for his son, Kieran, not to kill him, not to arrest him…but too talk to him…Minutes later as John was searching he found a crowd which were gathered around a tall skyscraper, looking upwards, John slowing lifted his eyes up and tilted his head and there was someone standing on the edge, preparing for suicide, but this wasn’t just anybody, this was his son, Kieran.

    Luckily Kieran was unable to spot his dad staring at him, so John sneaked into the skyscraper and started heading up the staircase, he got to the roof, and opened the door…it made an obvious creaking noise Kieran peered over his shoulder, and turned around…

    Weirdly Kieran started talking to John, as John planned to start asking the question’s first ‘I gave you a chance; dad’ he said, cheekily ‘but you just “had” to come back for me didn’t you?’ John Smirked ‘I never came back for you…I’ve come back fo-’ ‘I don’t care why you came here, you made the wrong decision anyhow’ He interrupted.

    Kieran pulled a gun out of nowhere, but John had the same idea and countered by shooting Kieran’s gun out of his hand, Kieran was left unarmed, and had no choice but to be Handcuffed and questioned. Not only did John finally catch ‘The Invincible’, he saved his life from suicide.

    It was at the police station when the questions were asked, one of the other, but the last one was the most important, ‘What do you want?’ Kieran never answered, although his dad threatening him, his son’s actions kept him from torturing him.

    About 2 hours later, the same question was to be answered, until Kieran had enough and explained… It wasn’t revenge, it wasn’t to show up on the front page of the newspaper, it wasn’t anything silly like that…

    The simple reason his son Kieran is killing people, is the simple reason of him attempting to hunt down the killer of his mum. Well it was a long time ago, John and his family went for dinner, and his wife quickly went to the toilets and didn’t come out for quite a little while, until a man with a gun came slamming through the door and got away. It was Kieran who got the glimpse of the murderer.

    Kieran didn’t report to the police, he took matters into his own hands, and it went a bit wrong and he ended up where he is now. But the reason was no reason to have killed every policeman, kill half of new York left us with quarter of the population we had before.

    It also was found out, Kieran never got around to killing the actual murderer of his mum. Kieran was put in jail until further notice, personally done so by his own dad, Kieran accused him of being a backstabber, but John calls it saving the whole damn city.

    John still had some bad thoughts for his son, but looking at the bandage around his gunshot wound, he could only think of the good thoughts of Kieran being in Jail. There will still be more to come for Kieran when he gets out, or should I say, “if” he gets out.

  2. #2
    Obey's Avatar
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    The beginning needs a better attention grabber.

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