Quit taking drugs bby.
I mainly made this for @Aborted @Antipathy @Oneirish after a bit on analyzing your post patterns. After making a few connections, I came on serveral conclusions to describe our (Or at least my) behavior:
The wider picture: Amygdala Damage.
From what I understand, amygdala are two almond shaped organs located bilaterally inside the medial temporal lobes. They're mainly to responsible for "flight-or-flight" responses and processing of emotional (anxiety and fear) and memory. It's rather remarkable that it actually has the ability to override the brain fractions of a second earlier than other parts of it.
Now, the general effects of damage (Bilaterally or a single gland) are, emotional numbing/flattening (Blunted affect), memory loss (Short term significantly), risk-taking (And craving for danger etc.) and a few other less notable ones.
Damage to it can be done through physical trauma or after-effects of emotional trauma. Personally, for me, I do believe I've damaged my amygdala through drugs (There's stuff from my past that just suddenly pops in my head. I'll attribute it to months of memory I've lost from my past drug use. Mainly doing stimulants and deliriants.) but my question to you is if you have any of these symptoms:
I've faced a few symptoms (Trust me, my memory already started fucking up so there's a few more that I can't recall atm. ):
- Fear reduction.
- Intense anxiety ( Hypervigilance )
- Craving for danger & risk-taking activities ( This includes a "liking" to gore etc. )
- Decreased pain sensation
- Severe short term memory loss ( As of 3-4 years now. )
- Intense & Random mood switching. ( Bi-polar type experiences )
- Severe increased agitation when not actually presented with stimulii to induces such states
- Muscle twitches/spasms
- Severe Rush/Decrease of energy ( Think cocaine rush/crash )
- Random memory flashes ( Flashbacks of dark episodes from my past )
- Difficulty recalling events from long term & short term memory. ( I need a strong nudge to begin remembering. )
- Constantly analytic of environment
- "Overclocking" of processing speed of stimulii
A few stuff from HPPD ( Hallucinogenic persistant perception disorder, an extension of PTSD ):
- Minor audio hallucinations
- Moderate visual hallucinations ( Walls pulsing, Tracers, Enlarged/Diminished objects, Patterns moving/pulsing on solid surfaces )
- A few of the above also count as HPPD symptoms
The queer thing is, HPPD is a symptom of PTSD induced from drugs and damage of the amygdala is a side effect of PTSD.
Don't really know why I wrote this. Guess whoever has any of these can share whatever they did.
But I just wanted to know. I've already spoken to @Oneirish a bit about this and he experience quite a few of these.
Some interesting reads:
Amygdala Wiki
Amygdala Damage
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Hallucinogenic Persistant Perception Disorder
Amygdala Hijacking"
Last edited by Kenshin13; 09-12-2013 at 09:09 PM.
Oh look, another self diagnosed sociopath.
I've definitely noticed a difference with myself after abusing an assortment of different drugs.
Anti-social behavior, emotional shallowness, and callousness is actually quite common among teenagers. Certain anti-social patterns of behavior can manifest themselves during puberty, and then cease upon entering adulthood. The reason being is that during puberty, your body is going through many physical and hormonal changes. Your brain undergoes structural changes as well as chemical ones. Puberty is a period of chaos for your body; and depending on an individual's development, certain brain functions may be inhibited, resulting in these behavioral patterns. That's why teens are never diagnosed with anti-social personality disorder, one of the prerequisites of the disorder is adulthood. You have a problem if these antisocial patterns persist through adulthood, and you have to have more than a few to fit the criteria. If you are seriously concerned, seek professional help instead of taking "Am I a Sociopath?" tests on the internet.
Antisocial behavior is a broad term for behavior society ostracizes or deems immoral. Drug use, murder, sadism/masochism, and engaging in crime are all examples of antisocial behavior. Being quite doesn't mean your necessarily antisocial, and being a chatter box isn't a guarantee that you are not.
I'm not a professional. I can't diagnose you over the internet and neither has a professional. See a psychiatrist if this is a serious concern to you. I'm serious. If you think there is a chance, no matter how slim, that you have a serious medical condition, you need to seek help immediately.