Took meth and now I can't stop jerking off to the homoerotic paintings - MPGH
Home › Forum › Main › General › Took meth and now I can't stop jerking off to the homoerotic paintings
Took meth and now I can't stop jerking off to the homoerotic paintings
Posts 1–15 of 25 · Page 1 of 2
Took meth and now I can't stop jerking off to the homoerotic paintings
Guys please help I took meth and now I can't stop jerking off to the homoerotic paintings of post-renaissance master Caravaggio (self.Drugs)
Dear god that is one homoerotic Jesus. No wait this one is more so.
Guys help me. I'm usually not a Caravaggist in the slightest. I don't even look at homoerotic artwork much less homoerotic religious artwork. I usually just jerk off to either that Bernini sculpture depicting St. Teresa having an orgasm in front of one of those sexually ambiguous 16 year old boy angels, or one of Titian's depictions of Venus touching herself. You know, nothing gay just heterosexual appreciation for some classy erotic Christian artwork.
But I do meth just once and I spend 7 hours jerking off to Caravaggio's paintings of his boyfriends looking all slutty and an additional 3 hours admiring the detail of the drapery. Dear God there's another (that fruit looks palpable!), and another (the detail on the wine glass! Stunning!). Also this one (I can't believe it he finally painted a girl in something!). Holy FUCK this one too (How gay was 16th century Italy exactly?).
As fetishes go this is pretty fucked up. But it got worse when I got to the religious stuff, like any one of Caravaggio's 7 depictions of teenage John the Baptist naked in the wilderness with only a camel hair blanket. I mean I didn't even know this concept was in the bible but he found it and sure painted it a bunch. It appears they all were to put in churches or were gifts to cardinals and bishops too! Catholics have impeccable taste I must say..
Don't get me started with the rape-y vibes in his version of the sacrifice of Isaac.
26 photo-realistic masterpieces later I am still masturbating while trying to determine how he will include yet another 17 year old sexually ambiguous boy-angel in a painting about God speaking to St. Francis of Assisi. Holy shit he did it again! That is brilliant. Why would heaven not have homoerotic boy angels really? Can you fuck the angels in heaven? Bet you can.
Its even worse is that the man supposedly only painted using actual people modeling for him. Meaning this was actually something people agreed to pose in (GODDAM THAT IS A SLUTTY ANGEL).
I swear I'm not a Caravaggist it's got to be the meth making me uber-horny and appreciative of psychological realism in early Italian Baroque painting or something.
HOLY FUCK ANOTHER HOMOEROTIC JESUS!
I need to stop. My 18 year old little brother is concerned that I keep asking his friends to hold baskets of fruit and wear fake angel's wings.