It is a vast topic, nobody can tell you how to love yourself without long talks because we are all different. What I can tell you however is my experience, and you can reflect on it by yourself and see which area needs improvement.
Loving yourself begins with two steps: First) You accept who you are with all your faults. Second) Progress.
To embrace the first step you will need time and observation skills to see how others live their lives. You need to realize that nobody is perfect and that we all, no exceptions, suffer. The rich, the poor, the single. It is only a matter of how good your act is. Some people however choose to run from it, and some people choose to face it. So ask yourself this; are you ready to face the problem head on? If you are, then you have accepted yourself.
You see yourself ugly? No problem, most people do. You don't have a talent? No problem, most people don't. That is when the second step comes up; progression, because they both are connected with each other.
You are ugly? Shower and get a new hair cut. Change your clothes, you may not feel comfortable with what you currently have, so change it up. And after changing it up, remember that beauty on the outside matters not. At your 30's, will your wife care what you look like, or will she care about how you treat her, your success as a person, and how well life is going for your family? That is why you don't taint your personality; you work on it to become a better person. Beauty is temporary, but the soul is eternal.
You have no talent? Search for a hobby that suits you. People are not born with raw talent in their blood, they work on it, and work until they become good at it.
Every single thing you go through is an experience, isn't it? And through experience we learn, we change, and we see things we haven't seen before. It could be a deep talk with your friend, or seeing a beggar on the street. Either of those events may "tick" something within your head, and that tick is what we call maturation.
To progress is to mature. I am not talking about becoming a dignified god that has matured through countless experiences, not at all. Maturation is simply, to me, beating the you from yesterday.
That you from yesterday is the checkpoint you need to surpass at any given time. Doing your bed in the morning is hard? Do it. Do it and repeat to yourself, "This is my responsibility, this is for my progression". Repeat that in everything you may find hard.
It will not be easy, for a week or even a month, but over time they will seem like mundane responsibilities. It will become your routine. And how do you know when that happens? You will feel proud of yourself for doing it, and that is the reward of self discipline. You always seek to be the best version of yourself, not seeking approval of others. There is nothing is better in this life than being proud of your progress.
Of course there are other matters such as emotions and how being emotionally dependent on others is not good on the long run, but once you realize that life does not revolve around you and that your daily life is one of many, you will want to live the life of the few who truly enjoy and appreciate themselves. After all, there is no person who was there with you from the very beginning and will stay with you till the very end except yourself, so cut him some slack and have a deep talk with him, cry with him, consult him, and appreciate him.
Thus, know what your problems, accept them, and work on them.
Originally Posted by Mayion
