Let's all get in a big circle, hold hands, and sing Kumbaya.
Afterwards, turn that party into a homophobic horde persecuting individuals who we think may be homosexual based upon their choice in greeting.
Because it's all text-based and we're unable to determine sarcasm, let's make even bigger assumptions about their afternoon activities.
Then, if that didn't work out as planned, we'll become human beings again who can accept people for who they are.