Over the past week or so I have been talking about the stuff I do with my girlfriend. I talked about how we have sex all the time and got high in the woods. I talked about how I don't like to use condoms when I have sex with her because I can't feel anything. The list can keep going but I feel that this is a good place to end it. The truth is I don't have a girlfriend. I'm a 19 year old virgin that gets off to watching people get rape. The only thing that I have had sex with are my hands. My hands were the ones that are there for me when I get hard. My hands were there when I saw my first internet porno. My hands are there when I need to make a sandwich. My hands are always there for me. My hands don't reject me, they love me. That is why I feel that I will never need a girlfriend ever. My hands can do almost all that a girl can do and I don't have to cuddle with them after sex.
I have decided that the time in my life has come and I proposed to my hands last night. They were so shocked that no words were said, but instead we had sex. I'm taking that as a yes. I have set up a wedding date for January 5, 2014 and all of MPGH is invited. Please feel free to invite any of your friends or family, all are welcome to this magical event.
Originally Posted by iTzSeyeko
