Well shit..
This pretty much just ruined my entire day...
Here I am, immediately following a fairly large dump, and I look to my right and see a fucking empty toilet paper roll
God damn fucking piece of shit nuggets
The toilet paper is downstairs and my entire family, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins are all down there. FML I have no escape...
Just use your hands to scrape away all the shit,then find someone you don't like and shake his hands.